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Updated Mar 06, 2025Everything You Need to Know About Bridal Shower Invitation Etiquette
Here's the who, when and how.
Bridal shower invitation etiquette takes a little more effort than you might realize at first, especially if this is your first time hosting such a party. If you've been charged with the task of sending bridal shower invitations—or you're a to-be-wed wondering about the next steps—you've come to the right place. We're answering all of the biggest FAQs about bridal shower invite etiquette, including who to invite, what to say, when to send them, how to keep track of RSVPs, and the verdict on adding a wedding registry to the invitations. Whether you're planning a classic tea party, a backyard barbecue or a fancy brunch, here's everything you need to know from the start. (And when you're ready to start mailing your invites, be sure to shop the gorgeous stationery options at The Knot Invitations.)
Bridal Shower Invitation Etiquette Basics:
Who to Invite | How Many People to Invite | When to Send Invites | Who Sends Invites | Where to Shop | What to Include | How to Write Invites | How to Send Invites | RSVPs
Who to Invite to a Bridal Shower
Traditionally, the bridal shower guest list consists of the bride-to-be's bridesmaids or attendants, closest female friends and relatives. It's also considered proper etiquette for close relatives of the bride-to-be's spouse to attend the shower. This could include their mom, sisters, grandmother or another family member they're super close with. If the bride's future MIL is hosting the bridal shower, expect even more in-laws to attend, such as aunts and cousins.
All that said, you're free to invite anyone to the wedding shower that you feel should be there to celebrate. At the end of the day, it's up to the host and the guest(s) of honor to make the final call about who to invite to the bridal shower. (Just remember, everyone who comes to the shower should definitely be invited to the wedding, so if you're hosting the shower for the to-be-weds, have them sign off on the final guest list.) Nowadays, it's not unusual for couples to have a joint or coed wedding shower with both sets of their loved ones present. But even if you're not having a joint wedding shower, your partner can choose to show up and mingle toward the end of the party.
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Finally, you're also welcome to invite out-of-town guests to the bridal shower, as long as you give them plenty of notice. If the guest list is starting to feel a little long, consider having more than one shower to accommodate different guests in different locations. One could be hosted by bridesmaids for close friends of the bride only, while another could be hosted by the bride's future MIL that's attended by family.
How Many People Do You Invite to a Bridal Shower?
Inviting between 30 and 40 people to the bridal shower is the sweet spot, with the understanding that some people probably won't be able to attend. Your actual guest count will depend on where you're hosting the party. If you're renting a bridal shower venue, double-check the guest capacity first. If you're hosting the party at home, think about how many people you can comfortably accommodate—consider the number of chairs, tables, plates and other party items you already have and whether you'll need to budget for additional rentals.
When to Send Bridal Shower Invites
In order to give guests enough notice, bridal shower invitations should be mailed about four to six weeks in advance. If the guest list includes out-of-towners, it's considered good bridal shower invitation etiquette to leave a little extra time. Sending the bridal shower invitations at least two months in advance should give out-of-town guests enough time to organize travel and accommodations, decide what to wear and purchase wedding shower gifts.
Who Sends Wedding Shower Invitations?
The party host is responsible for sending the wedding shower invitations. That said, you should ask the couple to approve the guest list before sending anything. (Unless the couple specifically says they want to be surprised, it's safe to assume that they want to be somewhat involved in the wedding shower planning.) In most cases, the host is also responsible for selecting and paying for the shower invitations, unless you've already decided to split the bridal shower costs a different way. If you need to delegate some of the work to other members of the wedding party, put one person in charge of collecting addresses and getting guest list approval, and another person in charge of choosing and sending the invitations.
Where to Find Wedding Shower Invitations
ICYMI, you can shop dozens of bridal shower invitation designs on The Knot. There are styles to suit pretty much any bridal shower theme, from "brunch and bubbly" bridal shower invitations to boho floral bridal shower invitations. To make your job even easier, you can also filter by style (think: whimsical, watercolor, greenery and more). The icing on the cake? On The Knot Invitations, you can customize your design by changing the font, editing the text and choosing different colorways. Simply find a design that matches the bridal shower theme, personalize the details and you're done.
What to Include in Wedding Shower Invitations
Most importantly, the party date, time and location (including the exact street address) should always be included clearly on your wedding shower invitations. It's also proper wedding shower invitation etiquette to include the name of the guest or guests of honor and the event type—in this case, you could go with "bridal shower," "wedding shower" or "couple's shower." The last thing you'll absolutely want to include is the host's name and contact information for RSVPs. That way, guests can easily let you know if they're able to attend or not.
Once you've got the basics down, feel free to add other information such as the theme, dress code and special requests, for example if you want each guest to bring a recipe card or other item. Finally, remember that some guests will want to purchase wedding shower gifts from the couple's registry. Follow bridal shower invitation registry etiquette by adding a link to the couple's wedding website (if it's synced with their wedding registry) or a list of stores where they're registered.
How to Write Wedding Shower Invitations
Since wedding shower invitations are generally less formal than the actual wedding invites, you don't need to go overboard with fancy calligraphy or hand lettering (unless you want to). It's okay to opt for printable wedding shower invitations or order themed invitations online—the most important thing is that the invitation wording includes all of the important details. Not sure where to start? The Knot Invitations has dozens of bridal shower and wedding shower invites that you can easily customize by editing the names, wording and other information. Note that wording will be a little different depending on the type of event. For example, a couple's shower in honor of both to-be-weds will require a slightly different approach than traditional bridal shower invites. Finally, when it comes to addressing the bridal shower invitations, pay close attention to correct name spellings, titles and preferred prefixes.
How to Send Wedding Shower Invitations
Similar to invitations for the big day, shower invites are typically sent by mail. That said, some couples opt for digital shower invitations instead. Ultimately, it's up to the couple and the host to decide which route to take, depending on the timeline and budget. Regardless of whether invites are sent by mail or email, bridal shower RSVPs are usually requested via phone or email.
How to Collect & Organize Wedding Shower Invitation RSVPs
The host should provide their contact details on the wedding shower invites (think: a phone number or email address) instructing guests to RSVP for the party that way. If you need guests' responses by a certain date, include that information on the invitation too. We suggest setting a date at least two weeks before the event so you have time to finalize any last-minute details. You could also request that people respond with "regrets only." That way, you'll only receive messages from those politely declining the invite (and hopefully escape a cluttered inbox while you're at it). Once the RSVPs start rolling in, use a guest list manager tool to keep track of everyone's responses. And finally, while RSVP cards are useful for the actual wedding day, they aren't really necessary for wedding showers.
Samantha Iacia contributed to the reporting of this article.
